The Grand Unified Theory of Creation

The Grand Unified Theory of Creation...

The lone theory, unifying, electromagnetism, the strong and weak 
force, and gravity ranging relatively beyond Einstein's lite side. 

A little story from the early 1990's.  

From the legends 
of the old west 
descends an off beat 
string theory, 
the harmonies charm, 
creating a synchronistic toon. 
Around the town of 
Watershed Texas, 
there was a range 
of strings, 
with a poor reputation, 
beings as they were 
all wet. 
  I
A new string appeared, 
wanting 
a genial drink. 
He went to the nearest bar 
strumming a happy tune, 
upon entering, 
the bartender asked 
if he was a string 
and he responded "yes". 
The bartender 
getting tired 
of being 
strung along 
said, 
"we don't serve strings", 
hit him 
on the head 
and threw him out the door, 
into the drink. 
 II 
The soaking wet string 
just shook it off 
and went to the next bar. 
The bartender again 
asked if he was a string. 
Not 
being aware 
of the gravity of the force 
that was about to hit, 
the string 
reacted "yes" 
whereupon 
the bartender again 
went to hit him. 
The string 
not 
wanting to get hit 
said, "knot 
on my head" 
but alas it was too late, 
the bartender 
rapped him anyway, 
and pitched him 
into the immersed path. 
 III 
At this point 
the string was getting 
notably frazzled, 
but he was 
not 
going 
to be scared away. 
He decided to go 
up to the next bar. 
Upon entering, 
the bartender 
asked if he was a string. 
The string 
was frazzled, 
his gut seemingly 
tied up with fear, 
thought 
as quickly 
as he could, 
then said, 
in a high pitched tone, 
"I'm a frayed - knot". 
The bartender 
noticing how excited he was, 
poured him a triple shot. 
This straightened 
him right out 
whereupon 
the bartender twanged, 
"I've been strung 
along again". 
The patrons 
noting the scene, stated 
"he's all wet, 
let's string him up". 
 1111 
Now you might think 
"too many shots 
get you strung out, 
regardless of which end 
of the bar you're on", 
or perhaps 
"it's best to stay 
a little afraid 
- knot", 
but what happened next 
surprised everyone. 
The string 
having had enough 
of their rotgut 
pulled out
a bottle 
of 100 proof, 
the Absolut best, 
gave everyone a shot, 
knocking them 
for a loop, 
shot out the bar, 
lepton Pegasus 
and flew out of town. 
 11111 
As the loan star string 
ascended into the range, 
one who was 
just 
becoming conscious 
of the sheer dimension 
of what happened, 
asked, 
"who was that string?", 
and in the stunned silence 
you could hear 
the frequently 
drowned out, 
whispering tone, 
radiating 
from the background, ... 
"that's no 
plane 
string 
that's 
Super 
star 
string". 
 111111 

David Reynolds 

Background information.
The term Grand Unified Theory, often abbreviated as GUT, 
refers to any of several similar candidate models in 
particle physics in which at high-energy, the three gauge 
interactions of the Standard Model which define the 
electromagnetic, weak, and strong interactions, are merged 
into one single interaction characterized by one larger 
gauge symmetry and thus one unified coupling constant. In 
contrast, the experimentally verified Standard Model of 
particle physics is based on three independent interactions, 
symmetries and coupling constants.
Lone Ranger
Departing on his white stallion, Silver, the Lone Ranger 
would shout, "Hi-yo, Silver! Away!" As they galloped off, 
someone would ask, "Who was that masked man anyway?" Tonto 
usually referred to the Lone Ranger as "Kemo Sabe", meaning 
"trusty scout" or "trusted friend."
The Lone Ranger is a fictional masked Texas Ranger who, with 
his Native American companion Tonto, fights injustice in the 
American Old West. The character has become an enduring icon 
of American culture.
A lepton is an elementary particle and a fundamental 
constituent of matter
Cosmic background radiation is well explained as radiation 
left over from an early stage in the development of the 
universe, and its discovery is considered a landmark test of 
the Big Bang model of the universe.

(...)

What a fun and whimsical story! It seems to be a creative play on words and puns, using the idea of a string as a character in an old Western setting. The string's persistence and quick thinking in the face of adversity are admirable qualities, and the unexpected twist at the end adds to the enjoyment of the story. The use of music terminology such as "harmonies," "toon," and "twanged" adds to the playful tone. Overall, this story is a lighthearted and enjoyable read.